Weirdest Dream

Okay... I had the weirdest dream last night.  If anyone can help me decypher what it means I'd be ever so grateful...

We didn't live in our current area, but in a city that I had never seen before.  One night, a freak storm passed through the city, doing a large amount of damage.  Fortunately and unfortunately, the only casualties were a family of four who had perished when their home caught fire from a rogue lightning strike.  Lost were a father, mother and their children: pre-teen son and an elementary age daughter.  We knew the family well as they went to our church and were friends of ours.

That gray morning, as we stood around their still-smoldering home with a gaping hole where the fire had begun, we comforted each other, saying the usual, "They're in a better place." 

From where I stood, I could see into the home to the living room -- suddenly a small movement caught my eye.  The rain was still spitting and sure that was all I strained my eyes to prove that was all it was.

As I looked, in the charred out remains of the couch, the outline of a man's head began to appear -- then his shoulders -- I nudged my friend standing near me and, speechless, pointed towards the house.  She looked and when I heard her gasp I knew she indeed saw what I was seeing.  Jeff, the man who lived there and who's body was now in the county morgue, was appearing before us.  We stared in unbelief as he solidified into a figure as real as anyone and not only that, but his wife and children were appearing next to him. 

The ghosts froze us and our entire small group in our place as we feared that any small movement would cause them to vanish.  Even our breath ceased during this moment as the unreality crept slowly into our reality.

When they fully appeared, we waited an instant and then all ran into the house, damaged as it was. 

What Does It Mean to Be a Christian?

I have been thinking a lot lately about Christianity and the rest of the world.  It isn't just my usual "thinking too much" personality, but it seems that I am being bombarded with this issue everywhere I turn.  Facebook, friends, politics, poolside... I even dealt with this at a cocktail party a couple of weeks ago.  Tomorrow I'm going to share a couple of these interactions.  But, for today, I wanted to say what it means to be a follower of Jesus.

I am a Christian. 

I believe that two thousand years ago, the Lord of the Universe was born in human form in the Middle East.  I believe that He was as human as you and I, with all of our possible faults, but also that because He was the One True God that He had strength to love perfectly, live perfectly, and while completely innocent, to receive the death penalty perfectly. 

We humans are so vain to think that we can "rate" good and bad behavior.  We say that hurting a child is the worst a person could do and that it's okay to tell little white lies.  We all judge a person who has an affair:  "He was driven to it" or "He is such a jerk for doing it."  And we all think it's okay to lust a little in fun.  We steal from the office, we lie when things get tight.  The funny thing about all of this is that if you, the reader, and I, the writer of this blog, sat down and rated a hundred bad actions from worst to least worst, and even if a hundred other people did the same activity, we'd be hard pressed to find two lists that were exactly the same.

My point in this is that none of us is perfect, and none of us has a perfect eye on what's good.  Not even our Supreme Court Judges are perfect judge-ers.

It's really hilarious from the Christians' point of view because we know that from God's view, none of us are perfect.  And we've all seen that the harder any of us tries to be perfect, the more likely they are to hide any faults, give in to vanity, or just break down with exhaustion at how hard it is to run on that treadmill and wear that mask of perfection.

And true to our human natures, the longer someone tried to be perfect the more trouble they are likely in when they give up.  Then all the rest of us, content and sleepy in our amnesia, stand in judgement at how awful society is these days.

Christians have the luxury of getting off that treadmill, lying aside that mask... giving up the notion completely of being perfect.  IT'S EXHAUSTING!  I know that I'm not perfect, boy, do I know it!  Yet I also know that I have a supernatural force that will rescue me when I call.

Every Christian that ever lived finally got to this place:  "I'm a mess, I give up all hopes that I have any intention of being otherwise--I've lied, stolen, lusted, deceived, betrayed and looked out for number one.  I've snapped at the wrong person with a venemous anger and I killed someone's dream.  I'm a failure and always will be."  But, we never, ever stay in that place. 

As G.K. Chesterton pointed out, even the symbol of our faith--two opposing lines--is a paradox.  The very essence of Christianity is a paradox.  The very microsecond that our heart breaks because we realize that we've failed so many times, Jesus bursts in and gives us a brand new heart.  Seuss almost had it right:  The Grinch's heart didn't "grow three sizes that day."  Georgie's nasty, old, scum filled heart ceased to exist and she was given a brand new one. 

God inspired Paul to explain it to us so well:
"We can understand someone dying for a person worth dying for, and we can understand how someone good and noble could inspire us to selfless sacrifice. But God put his love on the line for us by offering his Son in sacrificial death while we were of no use whatever to him."

That's from Paul's letter to the Romans, paraphrased by Eugene Peterson in The Message.

If I had to try to explain my faith in just a few words, I couldn't do as well as Paul.  Here's my feeble effort....

True Christianity is this: 

A Christian is someone who lets Jesus show them
how to live, love and forgive perfectly
because they watched Him do it in their life first.

--Tomorrow, I'm getting into some hard stuff: what Christianity isn't, and how Christians go about messing all of this wonderfulness up so badly.

Counting Stars

I spent this morning listening to Andrew Peterson's new album, Counting Stars.  First, I want to say that it is a great album to listen to on a quiet, sunny morning!

Peterson is always a big favorite of mine because I just love creative word plays and Mr. Peterson is a genius wordsmith.  His style is an acoustic mix of easy country rock and bluegrass that's sprinkled with a healthy dose of Narnia and wanderlust.  I also like his theology that is so evident in all of his songs, not just on this album, but in each song in each album. 

To me, it's like he's saying that a glorious sunrise or the wonder in a child's face are moments of tremendous worship to our Lord, and in the same breath, the redemption of a soul or the spontaneous healing of a terminal patient are fabulously ordinary moments for those of us who follow Christ.  For Christians the ordinary is miraculous and the miraculous is ordinary.

At the same time he sings these themes, he has an overwhelming urge to leave this miraculous life to spend eternity with the Savior.  It's no wonder that my favorite song on this album is The Reckoning (How Long), where Peterson sings about that strong desire to be in everlasting worship.  (I can't wait, either!)

It's another tremendous album; Congratulations, Andrew!

Nancy Drew Twister Walkthrough

Okay... this is just a few quick pics to help... not really a full walkthrough. I've done the whole thing, but thought I'd help others along their way. I'll post more later...

With the groceries, I've shown which ones to buy with the sale prices and budget. There's probably more than one solution to this. If you need me to post out exactly what to buy, I will.

European Americans With Possible Native American Ancestors

As I do genealogical research for myself and for my friends, I am often told that family lore is that one particular ancestor was a Native American. I've given this answer so many times that I could almost repeat it in my sleep, so I thought I'd take this rainy afternoon to write it all out once and for all.

Finding proof of Native American ancestry is extremely hard for a number of reasons that I'll go into in just a second. First though, I thought I might address the reason why a number of people are looking for proof: to be able to qualify for US Federal Government grants such as scholarships that are available to Native Americans.

If you think you are part of a Native American Tribe, your first stop is to call your local Bureau of Indian Affairs. You can find that information (and more) at the Department of Interior website: www.doi.gov/tribes/esablishancestr.cfm

I'm afraid that this part of the equation is not very good news for most people. What I have heard from a number of people who have ventured down this road is that unless the person requesting aid is a full-blooded Native American and most likely living on a Federal Reservation, then the chance of getting any aid is very small. But, who knows? Nothing ventured, nothing gained, right? The only cost in trying is your time.

The other side of the ancestor question is equally important to many: simply finding more about their heritage and whether it includes the riches of Native American ancestry.

Unfortunately, thanks to the Euro-centric natures of our other ancestors, this too is a difficult road. To explain, I need to go into a little history.

We all know that stories of the European explorers who came to America, bringing with them new, strange customs, religions and names. Contrary to what we learned in our social studies books as children, many Native Americans embraced a European lifestyle. (Many Europeans also embraced the Native American tribal lifestyle as well, never to be seen again in their settlements.) The Native Americans who chose to live as the European settlers became baptized as Christians, changed their names to European names, lived in European-style homes, built and successfully ran European style businesses and farms. (en.wikipedia.org/wiki/five_civilized_tribes)

Beginning in 1830, the Federal government began a series of Indian Removal Acts. The "reason" (and by reason I mean prejudice, irrationality, hatred) behind the acts was that the civilized tribes had successful pieces of land and the whites wanted them. Imagine any of your neighbors who live the same as you do, their kids go to the same school as yours -- they even go to your same church, but just because their great-grandparents were of a different race, they are forced to march a thousand miles to a barren prairie to completely start over from scratch. The Federal government at one time even barred missionaries from going into Indian lands in Georgia for fear that converted Native Americans would have a case for not being forcefully removed.

Of course, being neighbors with European settlers meant that many of the Native American and Europeans had intermarried. In general, when the head of the family (male) was a Native American, the family was removed to the west. If the head of the family was a European settler, then he and his Native American wife wouldn't be forced to move west, but scared of a forced removal later, many of these particular families moved into Tennessee, Kentucky, Indiana, Illinois, and even into Arkansas and Missouri. This one situation is why you will hear a lot of European descendants today speak of a Native American grandmother rather than grandfather.

So, when you have a complete name change (Pocahontas to Rebecca Rolfe) as well as a location change, you suddenly have an ancestor show up in your family tree who seems to just "appear" suddenly. Because they have a European name, there is almost no way of telling if they really were of European descent of if they were of Native American descent.

I know this isn't very helpful, but I'm hoping for you in your search that the stars will all align so that you can find your true heritage.

"Civil War" or "War of Northern Aggression"?

I was watching Ken Burns' Civil War on Netflix yesterday. I love this and could just about watch it every day. I love listening to it while I'm doing housework because it is a great "right-brain" activity that helps to keep me from getting distracted.

While I have seen it dozens of times, I never can get over that both sides felt that they were being led by God. Overwhelmingly. This was a time in our country where most people were Christians--true Bible-believing, praying Christians. When they say they were led by God, I cannot help but to believe their testimony.

Of course, I've grappled with the paradox of how God could lead both sides to oppose each other. After a great deal of thought and even more prayer in this area, I think I have an answer.

In the Bible, God calls the Host of Heaven together and asks who can mislead a king into battle and to his death. Finally a spirit comes forward and says that they-the spirit will put lies in the mouths of the prophets to get the king to go into battle and to his death. [I Kings 22]

You see, we had to fight this war because of the atrocities we had inflicted on both the Africans and the Native Americans. God did not punish America, but He let a lying spirit lead us to punish ourselves in the most horrific way possible.

I have come to believe not so much in a God who punishes but a God who removes His protection. Our pride in believing lies such as Africans "had the mark of Cain so were ordained by God to be slaves" or Native Americans "must be moved westward because they are heathens" led us to unspeakable horrors. God could not and would not have protected us from ourselves.

The truest horror of these beliefs were that they were preached from pulpits in God's Name. It should sicken all of us to think of that today.

Yet, what "lying spirit" beliefs are preached from the pulpit today?

How many emails do you forward that speak about injustices to immigrants?

What would you do if a gay couple came to your church?

Back in 1992, my husband and I, Church youth group leaders at the time, took our group to a nearby church to see a presentation of GodSpell. When the church opened their doors to allow seating, the line to get in was perhaps a hundred yards long, with maybe three to five hundred people in line. Just outside of the church doors, a homeless woman stood with a packed grocery cart asking for money. Erich, my husband, never misses an opportunity to give to a homeless person. As we approached the door, he discreetly handed off a wad of bills to her. The rest of us went inside.

Just before curtain, an usher came and got my husband and asked him to the back of the church. There the lady was waiting. She actually wasn't homeless, but an actor in the production. She handed Erich's money back to him. He was the only one--the only one--who gave her anything.

We're so concerned--and I put myself into this category--that someone will buy liquor with our measly donation, that we justify our stinginess with this. Really? An entire auditorium of "Christians" and only one person gave to "the least of these?"

====

So many people want to debate whether the war should be called the "Civil War" or the "War of Northern Aggression." Scores of individuals still worship this war to the point of making it their church and re-enacting the battles.

With apologies to Jane Austen, I think it should be called "The Result of American Pride and Prejudice."

Thinking about those modern lies we believe as "good Christians", I want to really call it "The Result of American Pride and Prejudice, Part I," because surely, God will not stand by and let us continue to use His Name with these lies.

Benefits of Nicotine

I was looking at the Wikipedia article this morning about fibromyalgia. I find it very interesting that one of the proposed causes of this is a dopamine imbalance.

Thirty years ago, everyone smoked or was in close contact with someone who smoked. Now, I'm not for smoking, but nicotine itself is a wonderful, naturally occurring chemical. I won't go into it now, but we have to realize that thirty years ago, just about everyone was on this mood enhancer.

And, big surprise, nicotine raises dopamine levels.

I believe that our smoking and second-hand smoking--while obviously detrimental to the lungs--did an amazing job in warding off a lot of today's ills. I bet if we looked at it closely, we would find a link between lower nicotine levels and many of the conditions we have today that seem so much more prominent than they were thirty-plus years ago, not just fibromyalgia, but also ADHD, childhood/adolescent obesity, road rage/sports rage, etc. I'm not saying we should start smoking again, but I don't know that I'd be against a nicotine supplement.

Puzzling Foot Pain

Those who know me know that I suffer from chronic foot pain and have for years. My mother has a picture of me from high school, asleep at my bedroom desk, with my feet soaking in a tub of water from the pain.

Yes, I mistreated my feet--shoes the wrong size, too high of heels and so on--but I can remember as a child running and pulling the muscle along the arch of my foot on a regular basis.

I take hours each day doing the silly treatments my doctor recommends: TENS Unit on each foot two hours a day, stretching, icing, creams, wraps, pads... the list is endless. He now wants me to have surgery. I'm not so sure. Not that I have anything against surgery, I'm just not sure this is the right surgery. This is the common plantar fasciitis surgery.

But something puzzling has happened.

Two nights ago (Thursday night) and last night (Friday night), my husband Erich spent more than an hour each night massaging my feet. I know, the greatest husband in the WORLD! But when he first started on Thursday night, the muscles in my foot were so tight, so cramped that he could not spread my toes at all. He said my toes were curled tight like when you tickle a baby's foot. The funny thing was I had almost no pain all day yesterday.

Last night, he again spent almost an hour massaging my feet. I have to say that this morning, sadly, I have some pretty significant pain in my left foot, but none in my right foot.

It just doesn't seem to me that this kind of cramping is just plantar fasciitis. The problem with all of the other treatments the doctor recommends are so very temporary. Each one is just a "band-aid" for the moment. I'm afraid this surgery will be also.

I know the regular causes of cramps, potassium, dehydration, etc. If I am having constant foot cramps, these are not like regular muscle spasms. Whatever is wrong with my feet, this isn't just a "charlie horse." I've had muscle spasms and muscle cramps. This is definitely not the same thing. My feet feel more like they've been injured, like someone has beaten my feet (all over, top and bottom) with a baseball bat.

All I know is that this pain, whether caused by my weight, my age, the humidity, just "lemons" for feet, whatever -- I just don't know how much more constant pain I can take. I don't know how much more of my life I can just miss.

Guard Your Hearts Against Prejudice of Any Kind

Several things are on my mind this morning. While they have wildly different sources, they all have one thing in common: prejudice.

I'm studying Esther using the Bible study by Beth Moore. It's just wonderful. This week, we're studying how Haman, a servant of the King, could hate Jews so much as to appeal to King Xerxes to have them all annihilated. The comparison to Hitler in our own day is not hard to see.

In my genealogical research, I have again come upon the possibility that a family had a Native American ancestor. It makes for a very hard puzzle when the ancestor took on an English name. When Congress voted on the Indian Removal Act of 1830, Native Americans were forced to move west, and their land was taken and given to European Americans by lottery.

I just can't imagine this kind of prejudice: you live next door to someone who's "different" in some way. Suddenly, a law is passed that means they are going to lose everything--possibly even their life--just because they are different. A particular day is coming when they are going to be removed... erased... pillaged, killed and annihilated.

In Esther's day, messengers were dispatched throughout the Persian Kingdom with the decree.

Hitler rounded the Jews up into ghettos and then straight to the camps.

The US Congress ordered the US military to remove the Native Americans in what one soldier called "the cruelest work" he ever knew. Thousands died in what we now call "The Trail of Tears."

Annihilations like this are not new--nor are they finished. We've seen it over and over again with Iran and the Kurds, Rwanda, former Yugoslavia. Very recently, we see it in Orissa, India, where members of the Hindu population are prosecuting Christians, Darfur, and the horrible haulocaust happening in the Democratic Republic of the Congo.

How can this happen? We all cry out this at some point. How can a civilized country try to annihilate an entire group of people? How much hate can be born?

And that is the essence of the problem: hate. Not one person reading this and not the person typing it are innocent of hatred. Jesus said that if you hate someone you're already guilty of murder and that's pretty much the sum of it. It is such a baby step from hate to murder... so hard for us to imagine yet so easy of us to digress.

Who do we hate? We hate pedophiles. Sure this is a group of people who are not innocent. That's an easy one for us to admit. Who else?

We hate illegal immigrants, mostly Hispanic. Introduce into the debate illegal immigrants from Canada or Europe and we're far more understanding. How easy would it be for a dictator to appear on the scene in the US and demand that all illegal immigrants should be sent to concentration camps? The day is ripe for this, but make no mistake, it is as heinous a crime as Hitler himself committed.

After September 11, we were very careful that no one begin malignant feelings against all Muslims. Yet we know in our hearts, a dictator could choose them as his or her target. Just as Jews have been targeted, so could Muslims... even Christians, atheists or pagans could face possible destruction.

Where hatred has created the arid environment of apathy and anger, anyone could light the match that begins the flames of genocide.

Please hear me at how small this step is! Guard your hearts today! Keep all prejudice--all anger--all hatred--and especially, all talk of an "us verses them" mentality--keep it away from your heart.

This is how we make a better world.

Separation of Church and State Is a Nice Dream

...but an impossible reality.

Everyone worships something, whether it's the environment, money, education, or God. You can worship sports or shopping. Where you spend your time, talents and treasures, that's what you worship.

And like it or not, we all (being human) want the government to be in agreement with what we worship. If we worship sports, we want the government to be involved to make sure it's fair. If we worship education, we want the government to make sure that everyone can get an education (whether they want it or not).

So, yes, though I am a Christians and involved in the Christian community, I do wish separation of church and state was not only a goal but a reality. I do not want the government to have one iota of say in our church or in our church school.

Unfortunately, we all take our church to the statehouse. In the pre-1960's days, the courthouse and statehouse ruled against every belief that came against Christian-Judeo traditions. Today, the pendulum swings back as judges and the ACLU believe this myth as truth and simply judge against those of traditional faiths. All they're doing is siding with the church of atheism, choosing one church over another.

I don't know what the answer is. I do know two things. One, I know from history that Thomas Jefferson is right when he said, "Government big enough to supply everything you need is big enough to take everything you have. ... The course of history shows that as government grows, liberty decreases." You and I are going to disagree about a million points in this life. Let's try to solve it on our own rather than take it to the courthouse each and every time.

You can't legislate morality and you can't legislate reason. We can reach what Shelby Foote called the great American genius, Compromise. No, you may not be thrilled with the outcome and I won't be thrilled, but if we both get a little it is far better than getting everything at the cost of someone else. If you've been on the losing side, you'll agree that compromise would have been a far better choice.

The second thing I know is this: Several of my friends on Facebook have joind a group in favor of Separation of Church and State. I know that now, whenever I see the phrase "Separation of Church and State," I give a little chuckle at the naivete of the person spouting it. What they're saying--whether they're a conservative or a liberal--is that they want what they worship to be king of the hill, Capitol Hill.